I want to wake up, and have Al Gore getting ready to finish his second term. We all have health care. The economy continues to operate with a large surplus. The Kyoto Accord has been scrapped–because it wasn’t ambitious enough, and the new treaty is much better. Since we now have independent, renewable sources of energy, Saudi Arabia has lost much of its influence–and the rulers have been forced to start being nicer to women. (of all things!) Saddam is probably still in power, but he’s a completely marginalized loon, and the Gore Administration has been focused on trying to help Israel’s neighbors learn how to co-exist with an actual staunch democracy, and treat other countries in the region as genuine allies.

Many things have happened during the past eight years, but the best part of all is that the World Trade Center is standing right where it always was. It’s still not attractive, but it’s tall, and we’re fond of it, and thousands of people go to work there every day–and come home safely at night.

Sigh.

Instead, we’re living in a nightmare, and increasingly, Democrats are part of the problem. I’m not sure I want to post any links, because even space aliens have been sitting at their dinner tables all week saying, “whoa, this is out of control, when’s Opening Day?” (Side-note: life really is topsy-turvy, because President Bush was pretty funny.)

And James Carville is suddenly the voice of reason. I’m starting to think that we actually are living in a world without shrimp.

My grandmother–a person I miss absolutely every day–used to have a saying, “God don’t love ugly.” Mostly, she said it when my sisters and I quarreled–which was often. And if she were watching this current election campaign, I believe she would have me pour her some more sherry and say, “Honey, let’s put on some stories.” (”Stories,” being soap operas or television dramas.) We would be entertained. We would enjoy snacks. Life would be delightful.

I was watching CNN today, which showed a very lengthy clip of an angry reverend’s sermon, after which, the commentator said–with no sense of irony, “That was given on December 25th, 2007″ or words to that effect. In other words, it was Christmas. Which, within the context of the Christian faith, is generally considered kind of a Happy Day. Instead, the parishioners were bombarded with a stream of invective. I have to say, that is not a church I would attend twice–nor would I buy the CDs/DVDs/whatever, in order to listen to the shouting again at my leisure. (So, it goes without saying that I would not go again and again for twenty years–until, finally, my own personal ambition forced me to take the spiritual mentor from whom I purloined the title of my best-selling book–and throw him under a bus.)

This, of course, after tossing Samantha Power onto the subway tracks, while the other campaign hurled Geraldine Ferraro out of an airplane–and, well, God don’t love ugly. (obviously, insert your own higher-power-of-choice–or no higher power whatsoever–into that statement, to make it fit within your personal belief system.)

Can the grown-ups come out and play now? Are there any grown-ups left?

Here is what I think is going to happen. Senator Obama will be the nominee in November–and he will lose. It won’t be pretty, and if Senator McCain is wily enough to pick Colin Powell or Elizabeth Dole or someone of similar stature as a running mate, it will be an absolute landslide. You can crunch the numbers right and left, but Senator Clinton isn’t going to be able to pull the Democratic nomination out–without half of the Party sitting at home in November and sulking, as they toss their beanbags up and down in the air. I think the smart move would have been for her to pull out quite some time ago, let Senator Obama take the complete blame for the upcoming November debacle, and then learn from her mistakes and run a much better campaign in 2012. But, I’m pretty sure she is going to keep scuffling all the way to Denver–and the end result will be that two potentially fine Presidents are going to crash and burn. There’s something to be said for being a statesman or woman–and I sure as hell haven’t seen one in either campaign lately.

So disappointing. So unnecessary. So incredibly short-sighted, and stupid. The only thing I can say with reasonable certainty is that I have no intention of voting for anyone I do not consider a grown-up. Which puts me in quite a pickle.

All things being equal, I found this site more interesting than anything else I read today–although it is, by no means, cheery.

However, I was here recently, and it was excellent.

And I don’t like the war, but this is cool.

Finally saw Juno. Totally dug it. If I were ever involved with a movie–a scenario I do not anticipate, frankly–I would want Ellen Page to be in it. I am looking forward to seeing Smart People next month.